When I told my friends about our trip many of them exclaimed “Wow, you’re brave. I’m not sure my marriage could handle that.” The thought never even crossed my mind until several people said something.
I’m not going to paint my marriage as perfect by ANY means. But Mark and I have always gotten along really well and been on the same page about almost all of the “big stuff”. His desire to travel and have a life of nomadic adventure and my desire to have more typical home life is by far our biggest hurdle.
When Jane was born and both Mark and I had new jobs we were living in a tiny house that didn’t allow for a home office. We had a giant heated and air conditioned “shed” in the backyard. We craigslist-ed some cubicles and set them up in the shed and worked side by side or rather cube by cube for over half a year.
We brought the coffee pot out there. We had a fridge with waters. We’d often give each other work advice after overhearing each others work calls. We both really loved working together in that little shed. We’d often joke about the “water cooler talk” at the office that day while having dinner in the evenings.
We’ve definitely gotten on each others nerves a bit on this trip. We tend to pick at each other more in a joking/annoying manner. My friends and attest that I still need a phone chat to rant about my annoying husband from time to time. But its amazing really. 99% of the time we still really enjoy each others company and want to hang out together.
In our short almost 7 years of marriage I’ve learned and tried hard to practice two things.
The first is always be serving the other. If you’re both trying your hardest to serve each other life seems to run pretty smoothly.
The second is we try really hard to speak to each other kindly. This has been our best practice for avoiding unnecessary confrontation when nerves are high. Especially while traveling. We try to practice using kind words and tone. We tend to avoid much of what could be potential disagreements by doing this.
Mark is way more level headed than I am. I think most men are. He listens to my frustrations and emotions almost daily. He goes above and beyond to make sure the kids and I are happy and content in enjoying this adventure. In my opinion during this trip he’s been the one really carrying the family. He’s doing more and putting more into the marriage than I am right now. I’m so grateful for his patience and love.
We sometimes play the game of “If you had to pick any other person that we know that you think you could complete this trip with you who would it be?” And we’re always so glad that we’re in this together.
I truly think that I’m the luckiest girl to be married to him. While are quarters are tight so are our goals and focus. Those things will allow us to achieve, together.
This journey may be hard but there’s no one with whom I’d rather be traveling. Thanks Mark!
Could you travel with your spouse in less than 200sq/feet for a year? Could you share an office with them?